Trust the Spirit

Last month, I had an encounter with the Lord and His Word that brought me to tears and overwhelmed me in His love.

_So…

In the past one month or so, I had been putting much pressure on myself on how much I wanted to know God and get better in a specific challenging area of my life. I had done everything within my knowledge of His Word, instructions, ability and faith, but the progress was really slow. It almost felt like a thorn in my flesh that brought me to tears and kept me calling on Him for help, and after a while, I started to feel like a disturbance, like He was tired of me coming back and stressing over the same issue.

One evening, while working at my desk, I told Them (Abba, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit) that I needed to do something to rewire my brain, to stop thinking in certain ways. I was searching for a daily practice that would help me change. I thought of Romans 12:2, where the Bible teaches us to be transformed in our minds, and I asked what practical steps I could take.

Daddy responded clearly with a question: “Who does the transformation?” I paused, then opened my Bible and read the verse again:

"Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect." 
– Romans 12:2 NLT

The emphasis was on “let God transform you.” The Lord revealed to me that it’s His job to transform me. My role is to submit to Him and follow His lead. If I feel stuck in a particular area, I need to trust that as long as I’m submitting to Him, maintaining consistent fellowship, and living in obedience, He knows what He is doing.

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I usually sit with the Lord on my bed almost every night before sleeping. At this time, we have conversations and I hearken to His voice with the heart of a child and the affection of a lover; this night, as I sat with Him, a scripture in 2 Corinthians 3 came to mind. I reached for my Bible, opened it, and read:

So all of us who have had that veil removed can see and reflect the glory of the Lord. And the Lord—who is the Spirit—makes us more and more like him as we are changed into his glorious image.
- 2 Corinthians 3:18 NLT

Emphasis on the Lord who is the Spirit makes us more and more like Him. 

Phillipians 2:13 also dropped in my spirit, serving as a third confirmation- "For it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure."

The next day, Ruach _{^{(I call the Holy Spirit Ruach- a short form for one of His names: Ruach Elohim)}} gave me a message for His people from that verse. I started studying it more for myself first and the message next, as I progressed, a question dropped in my spirit: ‘What is the individual’s role in the transformation process?’ I looked at the scripture more intently, read commentaries and did more research- the answers I got all bored down to what He had revealed to me the previous day above. Then another question popped in my spirit which was very personal: ‘How can I tell the difference between when the Holy Spirit is transforming me and when I’m trying to change myself?’

I felt a leading me to research it and right before I punched my keyboard, Ruach dropped an answer in my heart: “My way is slower. At least to the human perspective. Gradual and seemingly slow.”

I would share a few of the answers I got below and by the time I got to number ₂, I was in tears because I just read myself. I was so pressured and so scared, feeling inadequate and trying so hard to change myself when God wanted me to lean in and trust the move of His Spirit and timing.

1. Source of Power

• Holy Spirit-Led Change: When the Holy Spirit is changing you, the power to transform comes from God. This process is marked by reliance on prayer, Scripture, and sensitivity to the Spirit’s leading. You experience God working in and through you, often in ways that are beyond your natural abilities or desires.
• Self-Led Change: When you are trying to change yourself, the power source is your own willpower, effort, and determination. This approach often leads to feelings of frustration, exhaustion, or pride, depending on the results. The focus is more on what you can achieve through your own strength.

2. Motivation

• Holy Spirit-Led Change: The motivation is rooted in a desire to please God, to grow in Christlikeness, and to align with His will. There’s a sense of surrender and trust in God’s timing and methods. The change is often accompanied by peace, even when it’s challenging, because it’s aligned with God’s purposes.
• Self-Led Change: The motivation might be driven by external pressures, a desire for approval, fear, or a need to prove something. The focus is more on personal achievement or the desire to meet certain standards or expectations, which can lead to anxiety or a sense of inadequacy.

3. Process and Experience

• Holy Spirit-Led Change: This process is often slower and more gradual, involving inner transformation that changes not just behavior, but also attitudes, desires, and motivations. It’s characterized by a deepening relationship with God, a growing sense of humility, and a greater reliance on grace. There’s an awareness that true change is happening from the inside out, often in ways you didn’t anticipate.
• Self-Led Change: The process is usually more focused on outward behavior modification, with immediate results often prioritized. It can be a more rigid and controlled process, where you might feel frustrated if change doesn’t happen quickly or as expected. The focus is more on managing or controlling outcomes rather than allowing God to work.

4. Outcomes and Fruits

• Holy Spirit-Led Change: The outcomes are consistent with the fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23), such as love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. The change is sustainable and leads to a deeper sense of fulfillment and purpose. There’s a growing sense of freedom and joy as you experience God’s work in your life.
• Self-Led Change: The outcomes might be temporary or superficial. You might experience some success, but it’s often accompanied by a sense of striving or burnout. The change may not lead to a deeper relationship with God or lasting transformation. Instead, it might result in feelings of pride, self-righteousness, or disappointment if expectations are not met.

5. Dependence on God vs. Self

• Holy Spirit-Led Change: There’s a sense of dependence on God, where you recognize your own limitations and rely on His grace, guidance, and power. There’s an openness to His leading, even when it requires letting go of your own plans or expectations. The process involves regular communion with God through prayer, worship, and meditation on His Word.
• Self-Led Change: There’s a greater tendency to depend on your own understanding, resources, and abilities. You might rely more on self-help strategies, rigid plans, or personal determination. There’s often less prayer or reliance on God’s Word, and more focus on your own efforts to bring about change.

Can you see it? The very thing Ruach mentioned to me was also there in number 3. I found myself both crying and laughing at the same time… in that moment, I made the decision to _{truly surrender.}

Lately, Jesus has been gently reminding me, often answering my questions with the same words: “Yield time to Me. Yield time to Me.” He’s been urging me to stop worrying about when things will happen—when they’ll start, stop, manifest, or end. Instead, He calls me to focus on building intimacy with Him every day. He knows what He’s doing. So, I yield time to Him.

That’s the heart of this message. I’m not sure how it applies to you, but I pray that the same Spirit who highlighted this for me will illuminate it for you. Beloved, I can assure you, through scripture and experience, that the greatest joy in life isn’t found in an answered prayer, though that brings joy. The greatest joy is found in surrender—surrendering to the unfailing, limitless love of our heavenly Father and nurturing an intimate relationship with Him daily through His Word and Ruach. That’s where true joy resides.

I pray Jesus fills your heart with joy, hope, and faith—the kind that makes miracles happen effortlessly because He has become your delight.

I love you.

_{I pray that God, the source of hope, will fill you completely with joy and peace because you trust in him. Then you will overflow with confident hope through the power of the Holy Spirit.}

_{~ Romans 15:13, NLT Bible}.